I'm not allowed to hold my niece : (. Yes, a mother dog can reject her litter and turn on her puppies. My baby has always been very fussy but she stopped letting other people hold her right around the time she turned 3 months. 5sosfanfic. No, You Can’t Hold My Baby -- And This Is Why. My baby only wants me to hold her! I know those are the words I needed to hear when my Velcro baby was on me 24/7 and I didn’t know how on earth I’d survive. She had allergies or a mild cold a few weeks ago and wouldn’t be in the same room as the baby for a full 24 hours. Start slowly. First, work on having her be comfortable in your arms while the other person is around. Then, have the person talk and play with your child while you hold her. Then, hand him over to the other person for a short time and stay close. Finally, try to leave the room for a few minutes, and see how it goes. But some take longer than others, and that’s okay too. Answer (1 of 5): She’s in mommy protect mode, it will wane a little bit in a while. There is nothing wrong with protecting your babies. In a since-deleted post on Reddit, the new mother complained that her husband thinks she's being "too precious" with their baby because she won't let him spend time alone with their 7-month-old daughter. She is simply unable to let go of her daughter. Here is how this dynamic can play out at each developmental stage, with the mother’s needs centered to forestall the daughter’s individuation: Infancy. Mom guards her role of primary caregiver jealously and has a hard time letting anyone else, including Dad, become special to Daughter. My sister-in-law (married to my brother-in-law) wouldn't let anyone hold the baby at the hostpital, no one just her and the father. An overprotective puppy refused to let his owner touch her newborn baby, as captured in a viral TikTok video taken on August 5 in Fort Worth, Texas. New moms often question whether they are doing things right. And up until this point, the wife had no problems with their friendship. Separation anxiety is a perfectly normal developmental stage, but it shouldn't run your life and prevent your child from learning to cope with her fears. 6. My advice to everyone else is that if you have a friend or family member that just had a baby don’t ask if you can hold her baby. I also had a NICU preemie. 25/07/2011 at 8:51 pm. Endless Spiral Of Inadequacy Anxieties. Anonymous: Anonymous wrote: If your baby really will not accept being held by dad at all, make sure that dad is close to you and your baby as much as possible. If he interacts, talks, smiles, and so on with your baby, she will start feeling secure with him too. Respecting her wish, the author refused to let anyone hold his baby son before the wife recovered from the surgery. I also had not planned to co-sleep but it has been what felt right since she came home from the hospital. New moms often don’t want to let anyone hold the new baby, or baby simply won’t tolerate it. She even starts screaming sometimes if my mom talks to her. Looking back when I had my first, I was so protective of him and wouldn't let anyone hold him.. New Dad Wonders Whether He Was Wrong Not to Let Anyone Else Hold His Newborn Before His Wife Could. She doesn't nap much unless I'm holding her but if I put her down in the crib she only sleeps about … You aren’t worried that you’ll fail as a mommy. This is a civil lawsuit. With my first, my sil was sick, lied to me and only told me the truth weeks … I’ve tried leaving her in small increments. And of course, part of family bonding when a new baby is born is all about the cuddles; holding, touching and interacting with the baby in a normal and happy way. That's why this mother's decision to not let anyone touch her baby for the first month of it's life is … But dads, I’m talking to you here: do not give up. The nanny and dh handled the baby. His wife also admitted that she’d hate the thought she would be the last to hold their son. Read He Won't Let Anyone Hold Your Newborn Daughter. In particular, the unnamed woman is planning on restricting the physical contact her future child has with her husband's parents - unless … Parenting tips for moms. 2. • Surprise her with a bouquet of flowers and a card — “Can hardly wait to meet the baby! As a part of the legitimation lawsuit, the Superior Court can do a number of things: 1) declare the biological father to be the legal father, 2) award custody or visitation to the biological father, 3) set a child support amount and 4) change the child’s last name to that of the father. Keep in mind that your anticipatory anxiety about her tears often makes it … If someone is or has been sick, sorry but they need to stay the heck away. Anonymous ... Subject: Update to previously deleted thread- my sister won’t let anyone hold her baby . You’re doing a good job.”. Perhaps, you can place your arms under hers for a few seconds each day to share the experience until she trusts you a bit more, or feel more comfortable with it. So much so that it’s tempting to simply tune out, retreat to the room, and assume that the baby only wants mom. But dads, I’m talking to you here: do not give up. Your baby’s attachment to mom is nothing at all on you. In fact, mom may have gone through the same challenges, and only through time and practice has been able to break through. It’s all … No one will hold my newborn unless they've had a flu shot and DTAP. But then -- she went into labor. If you have a new baby and you’re freaking out about people getting a little too close, I’m not going to tell you to … My niece is now 7 months old and I have only held her once. Reach Out. It's a … OP needs to make sure he doesn't let wife marginalize him as dad. Each time any of my family asks to hold her my sister in law says things like "oh no she is tired" or "I'm just about to put her in her pram". I have ppd and ppa, and I just wanted to see my mom. I’m at a loss. "On the day that I gave birth, [Best Friend's] brother got into a car accident," she wrote on Reddit's Am I The A--hole forum. Don’t give up or tune out. You … Find the courage to honor your instincts, even if they don’t make sense to you. Maybe she feels fragile about his traumatic birth and needs to be near him that day. In fact, bathroom breaks are perfect for teaching her how to survive without your constant presence, providing you leave her in a safe place such as a crib or toddler-proofed room. But if you are a good guest, you will get other opportunities. Yes, the woman's husband his female BFF used to date, but they've been platonic friends for a while now. When my daughter was 10 weeks old, we had a large family event. Because I suspect odds of a future custody battle are high. I was reluctant to let others hold my newborn, especially the first time around. You can smile at the baby and play with the baby while the mom is holding her. The moment she’s placed back in my arms she stops crying. By 4 or 5 months, there are usually more times that you can put those babies down. You are your baby's social barometer in a sense. “Re-think your relationship as well, who the hell speaks to their wife like that especially after having baby.”. Not all of us think rationally postpartum. “It’s okay. You can help reassure her that she is doing a great job. Postpartum anxiety disorder is a cousin to postpartum depression (PPD) that affects about 10 percent of new moms, according to the American Pregnancy Association. You’ll be a great mom!”. Hi, so my little girl is 4 1/2 months and just recently she wont let anyone hold her except me! She sees her almost everyday. Here is the bad news: you might not get to hold the new baby on your first or second visit. Before I was even pregnant I knew I would have a child I would want to pass around. Am I the justno for not letting her hold my baby? • Call her from the grocery store to ask if she needs anything. Ask Aunt Kelly to hold the baby while you go have a shower. Recently she wants nothing to do with anyone but myself. Making babies stress reactive from undercare may be a good way to build an easily distressed personality and create a society of self-concerned folks. 5 tips to give mom a bedtime break: Let the non-feeding partner or caregiver become a source of soothing, right from the beginning. This is really upsetting me. No one was allowed to visit unless they had recent flu and DTAP shots. She appreciates your willingness to be the arms that give her a break when she needs it. Believe me, if the mom wants you to hold the baby she will tell you. Now, most of us wear face masks whenever we go out and see family and wash or sanitize our hands constantly.For anyone who's welcomed a baby into the world in the last year, you've likely kept your circle extra small and only let close family meet your baby — if that. I remember how careful they were about letting anyone in the NICU. Grandparents and Hospital Visits. Say "Diakuju" when your mother-in-law makes dinner, then go lie down with the baby. marchbaby19 22/03/14. Their immune systems are so fragile at that age. It is normal for family members to hold the babies born into their family. There's nothing quite like bonding with your newborn, with every touch bringing you closer to your teeny tiny child. 02/09/2022 08:19 Subject: Update to previously deleted thread- my sister won’t let anyone hold her baby . As a mom of two I quickly learned that there are definitely times when you should let someone hold the baby. 4. Hearing your baby shriek in your arms—especially when she doesn’t do the same with mom—can feel disheartening to any dad. When parents ban grandparents from visiting, usually it is to allow the new family to bond without any complicating factors. She loves that you adore her little person. This is a routine for me. She is so terrified of “the baby getting sick” she legitimately wore an n95 in the house and did not hold or sit in the same room as the baby for an entire day. And up until this point, the wife had no problems with their friendship. When baby is in the bath, grab the towel and just casually say “here, I’ve got her, you clean up in here” and take her to her room. Hormonal changes, amongst other physical changes can turn a normal, level headed person into a nut case. Trisha Leigh Zeigenhorn. Last thing a new mom needs is judgment and stress from her family. Let’s hear some thoughts…. New Dad Wonders Whether He Was Wrong Not to Let Anyone Else Hold His Newborn Before His Wife Could. Tell your sister she needs a f#cking punch in the throat then apologize and blame it on your hormones while savoring the good vent. Apparently, the author’s mom and sister were less than happy with the prospect, and that’s where the feud began. Then back to mom to … But then -- she went into labor. If family members or anyone are sick, under the weather or haven't washed their hands then No. Oh how naive, not only as a first time mother, but as my daughter’s protector. Don’t be pushy about holding the baby. The most common steps will be to first bond with mom and then with dad (and then with siblings, relatives, friends et cetera.) 6 answers /. Since your baby responds to your cues, it's helpful if you're calm and relaxed when meeting anyone who's new to your baby. No Vax, No Visit is a movement being propagated through social media and social pressure. 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